GoSeigen wrote:Scenario: small family-run business <10 employees, low staff turnover. Male employee age 50-55, the groundskeeper, is in most ways a dependable and useful worker but last week beat his partner (accusing her of cheating) on the premises in presence of another member of staff. This person is a foreign national, his partner local and they have three small children, he's likely to be deported if charged and is the main source of income for his family. Today at my instigation the employee and partner and I attended the local police station where the specialist family officer gave him a dressing down and a warning.
Question is, how stupid would I be not to dismiss this employee? Is it really dumb to give him a chance? If I dismiss him his immigration status will also be affected as we are sponsoring his visa application.
If I don't dismiss do we have a formal disciplinary in addition to the police involvement?
Help!!
GS
servodude wrote:
Only you are going to have the measure of the situation, culture and people involved - and it sounds like it needs delicate handling.
I can only really offer a general opinion based on what you've provided and on the fact that you are even considering keeping him on.
If you believe it was a momentary lapse, that he is genuinely contrite and that it will not cause issue (or set an unhelpful precedent) with other staff (or aspect of the buisness) I think that keeping him on, with serious conditions, could make sense.
It would need written up and recorded with all the "offical warning" ducks in a row - probably worth checking and revising what you have for staff contracts to make sure that the policy going forward explicitly covers what people can expect.
He will be significantly in your debt and knowing that should help keep him in check.
Another offence would be "do not pass go"
Difficult situation.
I can't really say a great deal more than sd already has. I think you've provided him with some boundaries and all you can do is hope that he is prepared to stay within them.
I'd like to try and express as tactfully as I can a small point please. I'm not taking sides and I am not condoning any behaviour. I don't know the person involved or have any knowledge of his character. There could be many reasons why he has resorted to violence. It could be a lapse, a moment where he has lost control. It could be that he has grown up in a different culture. It could be he's simply not prepared to restrain himself and is a controlling personality. Such personalities are difficult to see. They behave differently when they are in the presence of others than when they are with the person they are in a relationship with. Both men and women are capable of such. One probability that I feel many of us overlook is it could also be a mental health issue.
As I’ve said I cannot and will not condone his behaviour. It was wrong and he should be provided with some boundaries and a knowledge of what the consequences will be if he steps over them. However, I’d like to suggest you consider if he has any mental health issues. For example he may have clinical depression or dysthymia (a form of depression that is difficult to diagnose as it comes and goes in severity). I’m sorry I can’t suggest how you identify this. I can’t say you have to either. I’m raising this for you to think of.
You have mentioned that the male employee is from another country. Again and with no knowledge of where he has come from or why he has come to the UK one possibility that could lead to mental health problems is that he has come from a war-torn environment and has witnessed “one event too many”. That’s just an example.
I grew up in a dysfunctional family home. I was physically and psychologically abused until I left home. My father grew up in the same environment and his father to. In the last 2 years I have been diagnosed with RLS and ADHD. In short and amongst the host of symptoms I have endured and those closest to me I have struggled with something called “emotional regulation”. In very simple terms my amygdala wasn’t suppressed, and my frontal cortex was not functioning very well. Our amygdala is the source of our flight, fight or freeze response. I was in a constant state of “readiness”, ready to fight, to freeze or to run. I had no control over that. The way I try to describe to others is by using diabetes as an example. Diabetes is a chemical imbalance. In simple terms so is ADHD.
I’ve taken the time to explain why I have responded to your question. I don’t want anyone to think the post is about me. I have used my own experience as an example of how mental health issues can and, I wish I didn’t have to say this, do have an impact on how people behave. Of course regrettably and disturbingly they also, have an impact on those around them and those closest will suffer the most. I have spoken about a taboo subject. Mental health is a huge cause of domestic abuse and violence.
I’m also aware of the need to point out that his partner may also need support. It’s entirely reasonable to assume she may have a mental health problem and be in need of, at the very least, medical support. Resources are out there.
I have no idea how any of the above dovetails into your legal responsibilities as “the employer”. However, your opening post inferred that you were also aware of the consequences for those who rely on his income and that apart from your legal commitments you have applied some moral thoughts to your response. It is in the latter that I have replied and I hope those reading on do not feel the need to take issue with my motive for speaking out or indeed for the content.
Take care
AiY(D)