Friend requests from Facebook?

[stevensfo]

Why do so many people, whom I don't know but may have shared conversations with, want to be Friends?

Some are very nice-sounding people and we no doubt share common interests. Others are bizarre. But privacy is very important to me.

I have a small number of 'friends' who are mainly relatives, real friends and some old contacts from groups going back years.

What gives? Are they bored, lonely or have ulterior motives? Why would a young attractive girl from California with whom I've never conversed, suddenly want to be friends?

Steve

[gryffron]

I think there are several different reasons

Maybe they are just so impressed by you they want your brilliance to illuminate their lives little longer.
OR
Loads of friends implies they are popular. So some people try to "friend" absolutely everyone they cross paths with.
They're selling something. A lot of pyramid selling schemes try to push wares onto their "friends".
Outright con artists. Your attractive young Lady from California is probably a sweatshop in Mumbai.

Either way, just reject them if you don't want them knowing your business.

Gryff

[Lanark]

I dont look at facebook very often, one or twice per year, but when I do it always suggests ADD MORE FRIENDS and then suggests a bunch of people I dont know, so it is probably that.

[the0ni0nking]

One of the best things I ever did was delete Facebook.

If you don't have an individuals contact details in the real rather than virtual world then they're not what you would consider a "real" friend are they?

(Whether that's email/ home number/ mobile number etc).

The one think I do have is Whatsapp but that is ultimately based off your mobile number and no real different to texting back in the day.

[Loup321]

Why do so many people, whom I don't know but may have shared conversations with, want to be Friends?

Some are very nice-sounding people and we no doubt share common interests. Others are bizarre. But privacy is very important to me.

I have a small number of 'friends' who are mainly relatives, real friends and some old contacts from groups going back years.

What gives? Are they bored, lonely or have ulterior motives? Why would a young attractive girl from California with whom I've never conversed, suddenly want to be friends?

Steve

This happened to my ex recently. He posted something on Facebook, and a nice young lady from Singapore commented. They became friends, and she told him about a wonderful investment opportunity. He lost a very large amount of money.

Stay safe

[didds]

FB and other forms of SM are frankly the only way to promote local theatre shows etc I am involved in.

The local rag is a waste of newsprint - you provide your own copy and if you are lucky they print it weeks after the event.

Posters in shop windows is still decent - but only reaches those that walk down those streets and look in windows of those shops (not all shops take them and that's fair enough).

The man power needed to visit multiple surrounding villages with posters for their sole shop etc - in shop hours too , no point turning up at 19309 with a poster to a closed post office/shop etc - is unfeasible.

FB et al are merely tools in life. Dont like it, dont do it. I think all these celebrity dance/bake/whatever shows are total and utter bilge. So I don't watch them. Its really quite easy.

Of course it may mean if you don't "do" FB you'll never find out what is happening in your local community - if your local rag doesn't support it and you don't look in the shop windows that volunteers have been able to get to to offer a poster.

whatever

[DrFfybes]

Just ignore them.

I have one friend on Facebook, and that was because I hit 'accept' by accident. I only signed up as the Village has a reasonable group and a couple of other mailing lists I'm on migrated that way.

I haven't looked at the requests for a while, but just checked and there are 136, quite a few of which I've no idea who they are. Nobody seems to have noticed I've not accepted, and 2 of the 5 oldest have been dead for several years.

Paul

[Dicky99]

I wonder if it's a similar thing to LinkedIn. I found it puzzling how frequently someone who worked in my office but who had little contact with me would supposedly want to link with me. So on one occasion after such an invite I went and asked the person whether they'd sent me a LinkedIn invite and they said no but they had received an invite from me.

[Arborbridge]

Why do so many people, whom I don't know but may have shared conversations with, want to be Friends?

Some are very nice-sounding people and we no doubt share common interests. Others are bizarre. But privacy is very important to me.

I have a small number of 'friends' who are mainly relatives, real friends and some old contacts from groups going back years.

What gives? Are they bored, lonely or have ulterior motives? Why would a young attractive girl from California with whom I've never conversed, suddenly want to be friends?

Steve

I must be doing something different. I've never had a friend request of that sort, AFAIK. What I do get are friend suggestions which are just computer matches through people we have in common. Maybe that's what you mean. I've never had any sort of personal message or approach.

PS I do get amusing ones on Instagram. Almost always some buxom young wench who starts following me. When you check her account, she made have made a few saucy posts or maybe only one but her record shows she follows lots and lots of men.
It's pretty clear what these pathetic women ( if they even exist!) are after. It just amuses me that they think I'm that gullible.

Arb.

[Hypster]

I signed up for Facebook once, purely to see local village announcements/news/gossip. I never added "friends", never added profile information, or a photo. I never posted, just logged in to read posts.

After a week, I got a message saying I had been banned for breaking their rules. I've no idea what I did wrong. As I'd never posted anything, I was baffled how I could have done something wrong. But I later concluded it was because I'd not given Facebook any data, they couldn't make any money off me.

[stevensfo]

I signed up for Facebook once, purely to see local village announcements/news/gossip. I never added "friends", never added profile information, or a photo. I never posted, just logged in to read posts.

After a week, I got a message saying I had been banned for breaking their rules. I've no idea what I did wrong. As I'd never posted anything, I was baffled how I could have done something wrong. But I later concluded it was because I'd not given Facebook any data, they couldn't make any money off me.

Well, I restrict my groups to those that really interest me and to be honest, I get a lot of info from them. Most are serious and academic, so I get rather p*ssed off when I receive these friend requests.

But yes the data collection is annoying and many years ago I changed a lot of my personal info so that people who knew me would still recognise me, but no more. So my DOB has the correct month, but the day and year +/- 1, some other dates changed and a few fictitious places I've lived and worked. However I admit that in chatting on groups, we're often giving away maybe more info than we should.

Steve DOB 29th Feb 1925, Tashkent Primary school, University of Wallabaloo (Philosophy dept).

[GrahamPlatt]

https://buffer.com/resources/mastodon-social/

The fediverse. Decentralised social media where the user has more contro. Because it’s not as standardised, it’s a bit more effort than the commercial products. Lots of different interfsce Apps. https://www.pcmag.com/picks/best-mastodon-apps

Mozilla foundation also backing it
https://techcrunch.com/2023/11/03/why-m ... ng-future/

[stevensfo]

The only site I really miss is 'Friends Reunited'. I found so many old school friends and colleagues, and it was far more conducive to chatting than Facebook. Sad that it disappeared. I know one reason was financial, but there were others as well, esp. lack of serious moderation and too many juicy stories flying around.

Steve

[mutantpoodle]

while on subject of FB.......

if I 'unfriend' someone,,,does it show somewhere...do they get told I no longer want friendship??

[swill453]

while on subject of FB.......

if I 'unfriend' someone,,,does it show somewhere...do they get told I no longer want friendship??

No. The only real way of knowing you've been unfriended is to compare your current list of friends with an old saved one. Which isn't that easy if you've got hundreds or thousands of friends.

Scott.

[stevensfo]

while on subject of FB.......

if I 'unfriend' someone,,,does it show somewhere...do they get told I no longer want friendship??

I unfriended my wife many years ago. Truth was, we have different interests and she was sharing silly things and having deep conversations with her friends.

She never even noticed.

I think that I was friends with my sons when they were young, but they soon unfriended me when they realised I wasn't 'cool' and might find out what they were up to!


Steve

[Watis]

while on subject of FB.......

if I 'unfriend' someone,,,does it show somewhere...do they get told I no longer want friendship??

I unfriended my wife many years ago. Truth was, we have different interests and she was sharing silly things and having deep conversations with her friends.

She never even noticed.

I think that I was friends with my sons when they were young, but they soon unfriended me when they realised I wasn't 'cool' and might find out what they were up to!


Steve

I was FB friends with my son. When he went to university and made new friends there, one of those friends spotted that I, as his father, was his friend and said to him: "isn't that against the law?"

Watis

[stevensfo]

I unfriended my wife many years ago. Truth was, we have different interests and she was sharing silly things and having deep conversations with her friends.

She never even noticed.

I think that I was friends with my sons when they were young, but they soon unfriended me when they realised I wasn't 'cool' and might find out what they were up to!


Steve

I was FB friends with my son. When he went to university and made new friends there, one of those friends spotted that I, as his father, was his friend and said to him: "isn't that against the law?"

Watis

I hope your son played along and confided in him that yes, it was very illegal, and there was a warrant out for your arrest, but you were currently disguised and hiding in Bolivia.

Steve

[DrFfybes]

I signed up for Facebook once, purely to see local village announcements/news/gossip. I never added "friends", never added profile information, or a photo. I never posted, just logged in to read posts.

After a week, I got a message saying I had been banned for breaking their rules.

I had similar - apparently it is a requirement ot have a photograph, and in my 'alert' this was explained as the reason.

There was a bee on the windowsill at the time, so I took a photo of that.

Paul

[didds]

Just ignore them.

I have one friend on Facebook, and that was because I hit 'accept' by accident. I only signed up as the Village has a reasonable group and a couple of other mailing lists I'm on migrated that way.
Paul

This. Yopu can use FB for notificsations form things that are important to yopu, and never post and never have any "friends" . If you so wsh.

Its a tool.