The Lemon Fool

You're right.

Old fashioned tea rooms had carpets, wallpaper and drapes. And a gentle hum of conversation. Unlike the total cacophony of the modern cafe. Theres a Costa in town that's worse - the barrister chappie seems to be forever knocking the hell out the machine with a steel lump hammer.

Tedx wrote:You're right.

Old fashioned tea rooms had carpets, wallpaper and drapes. And a gentle hum of conversation. Unlike the total cacophony of the modern cafe. Theres a Costa in town that's worse - the barrister chappie seems to be forever knocking the hell out the machine with a steel lump hammer.

If he is a barrister, you would think he might sue the coffee machine maker for a new one, rather than trying to fix it himself with a hammer.

Nimrod103 wrote:

Tedx wrote:You're right.

Old fashioned tea rooms had carpets, wallpaper and drapes. And a gentle hum of conversation. Unlike the total cacophony of the modern cafe. Theres a Costa in town that's worse - the barrister chappie seems to be forever knocking the hell out the machine with a steel lump hammer.

If he is a barrister, you would think he might sue the coffee machine maker for a new one, rather than trying to fix it himself with a hammer.

Or possibly he has discovered that there are no Barristers employed in the Scottish Legal system, and he needs to find gainful employment elsewhere. In the meantime he is taking his frustrations out by thumping the coffee machine.

Tedx wrote:You're right.

Old fashioned tea rooms had carpets, wallpaper and drapes. And a gentle hum of conversation.

Like this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRgwbkdoIcY

I like dogs. I dont have one myself, but friends do.

But there are too many in this country. People who used to have 1 dog, but now have 2. Or more. To keep the 1st dog company because they've had to go back to the office post COVID.

Thousands of canines languish In dogs homes while folk seek to spend eye watering amount of cash on the latest trophy hybrid creation.

Dog turds are everywhere thats nice.

Tiny little forestry car parks leading to pleasant walks are jammed with idiots transporting their mutt in order to let it deficate far away from their house.

And then theres the 'dont worry, he wont bite you' brigade

Aye, right.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-64798162

Meanwhile Vets are coining it as these hybrid brutes seem to be more susceptible to illness. As are 'specialist' dog food providers. I Mean 'specialist' dog food. Blimey. My granny's Collie/mongrel got Chum. And a bone from the butcher on pension day. He lived to be 16.

For balance, there are too many cats too. But at least they keep the vermin at bay (we had a mouse coming into our garden to the bird feeder until a cat from next door caught a scent of it. Havent seen it since)

So, 1 house, 1 dog. And no hybrid dogs until the dog homes are empty.

Right, next.

Tedx wrote:I like dogs. I dont have one myself, but friends do.

But there are too many in this country. People who used to have 1 dog, but now have 2. Or more. To keep the 1st dog company because they've had to go back to the office post COVID.

Thousands of canines languish In dogs homes while folk seek to spend eye watering amount of cash on the latest trophy hybrid creation.

Dog turds are everywhere thats nice.

Tiny little forestry car parks leading to pleasant walks are jammed with idiots transporting their mutt in order to let it deficate far away from their house.

And then theres the 'dont worry, he wont bite you' brigade

Aye, right.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-64798162

Meanwhile Vets are coining it as these hybrid brutes seem to be more susceptible to illness. As are 'specialist' dog food providers. I Mean 'specialist' dog food. Blimey. My granny's Collie/mongrel got Chum. And a bone from the butcher on pension day. He lived to be 16.

For balance, there are too many cats too. But at least they keep the vermin at bay (we had a mouse coming into our garden to the bird feeder until a cat from next door caught a scent of it. Havent seen it since)

So, 1 house, 1 dog. And no hybrid dogs until the dog homes are empty.

Right, next.

I feel the same... but kids rather than dogs

servodude wrote:I feel the same... but kids rather than dogs

Ah but child owners don't take them to the woods to sling nappies into the trees.

kempiejon wrote:

servodude wrote:I feel the same... but kids rather than dogs

Ah but child owners don't take them to the woods to sling nappies into the trees.

No, they throw them down the loo
https://www.theguardian.com/environment ... ndon-sewer

Sorry this post is called ooooh not eergghhhh

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/articl ... TORCH.html

One of the reasons I dine out very infrequently. You never know how the food in front of you is prepared.
Or maybe this counts as traditional cooking in Middlesbro'?

Nimrod103 wrote:https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11813843/Takeaway-worker-caught-preparing-raw-chicken-alleyway-using-BLOWTORCH.html

One of the reasons I dine out very infrequently. You never know how the food in front of you is prepared.
Or maybe this counts as traditional cooking in Middlesbro'?

What's the problem? He was wearing gloves to prevent contamination
doolally

doolally wrote:

Nimrod103 wrote:https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11813843/Takeaway-worker-caught-preparing-raw-chicken-alleyway-using-BLOWTORCH.html

One of the reasons I dine out very infrequently. You never know how the food in front of you is prepared.
Or maybe this counts as traditional cooking in Middlesbro'?

What's the problem? He was wearing gloves to prevent contamination
doolally

Indeed, he was continuing the British BBQ tradition for chicken, cremated on the outside, raw on the inside.

Nimrod103 wrote:Indeed, he was continuing the British BBQ tradition for chicken, cremated on the outside, raw on the inside.

anyone for a botulism burger (with or without sauce sir )

True story.

Lochaber Mountain Rescue Team speaking by mobile phone to a casualty they're trying to locate:

"Are you in the cloud?"

Casualty answers "No, I'm on 4G".

Scott.

swill453 wrote:True story.

Lochaber Mountain Rescue Team speaking by mobile phone to a casualty they're trying to locate:

"Are you in the cloud?"

Casualty answers "No, I'm on 4G".

Scott.

Probably a plimsoll wearer from Leamington Spa.

swill453 wrote:True story.

Lochaber Mountain Rescue Team speaking by mobile phone to a casualty they're trying to locate:

"Are you in the cloud?"

Casualty answers "No, I'm on 4G".

Scott.

Bloomin' accents. To mishear a comment about foggy conditions like that!

UncleEbenezer wrote:

swill453 wrote:True story.

Lochaber Mountain Rescue Team speaking by mobile phone to a casualty they're trying to locate:

"Are you in the cloud?"

Casualty answers "No, I'm on 4G".

Scott.

Bloomin' accents. To mishear a comment about foggy conditions like that!

Almost as bad as when they asked that lass from Glasgow whose waters had broken where she was ringing from

simsqu wrote:

Tedx wrote:You're right.

Old fashioned tea rooms had carpets, wallpaper and drapes. And a gentle hum of conversation.

Like this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRgwbkdoIcY

My grandmother and her friend in a quiet tea room!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pk3ds-VFKBs

Steve

Full fibre braodband going in as we speak.

In days gone by, I might have been wetting myself with excitement (I remember when we first got broadband - 0.5mb/s.....but I'm not really feeling the 'Ooooh' with this (300mb/s). I mean I don't really need to download a movie in 5 seconds and since I grew pubic hair I don't play games anymore......so I'm not sure what there is to get excited about.

Anyone?

(Edit) - I have to say that the neighbours are more excited about it than me though!

Ok, I'm going to say Ooooh!

Before....

After.....

Tedx wrote:Full fibre braodband going in as we speak.

Is it arriving on an overhead connection from an old fashioned telephone pole?
Our housing scheme has underground ducts which provide the copper link to the fibre in the street furniture. But full fibre has arrived, and old fashioned telephone poles have erupted around the scheme with overhead fibre connections to houses. Complaints have been made - but apparently regulations allow such practice, whether or not there are existing ducts.