The Lemon Fool

I'm in my 50s and my favourite radio channels are Heart 70s, 80s and 90s.

Had a thought in the car. The "80s" were 40 years ago. So listening to the 80s, is like when I was in the 1980s, listening to 1940s music!

And the "70s" is 50 years ago so that's like in the 70s listening to music in the 1920s!!! That's mad.

Two ways of looking at it

1. I've reached 50+ years of age - some don't!

2. Oh Sh**...where did that go?

1980 was closer to the end of WW2 than today.

You really realise you are old when young people on public transport start getting up and offering you their seat.

Or, perhaps that is when you realise you are really old?

When doctors look like school kids....

You know that you are old when you have seen it all before.

When you see the same mistakes being repeated by people who should know better, because they either were not born or just learning to read the last time.

Adamski wrote:And the "70s" is 50 years ago so that's like in the 70s listening to music in the 1920s!!! That's mad.

I did

I had an HMV wind-up portable gramophone and a pile of 78s. I still listen to 20s/30s jazz, alas no longer have the gram but I still have the tins of steel needles, just in case I buy another one.
Here's the Cliftophone wind-up we had at home until a move to a smaller house.

I thought "at my time of life" when my contemporary became POTUS.

Since Obama left office I've been young again by that measure!

But I've attained the first couple of perks of the old fart. Access to my pension, and the railcard. I've been waiting for the latter ever since I ceased to qualify for a young person's railcard and was looking at more than 30 years of full-price travel

Age is when you wake up, swivel round to sit on the side of the bed with your feet on the floor and then wait 30 seconds before standing up.

It also is when you cannot stand on one leg while putting on sock on the other (I can still stand on right leg and put on left sock but not so good anymore standing on left leg and putting on my right sock)

Charlottesquare wrote:Age is when you wake up, swivel round to sit on the side of the bed with your feet on the floor and then wait 30 seconds before standing up.

Isn't that teenage? When you have no motivation to get up!

It also is when you cannot stand on one leg while putting on sock on the other (I can still stand on right leg and put on left sock but not so good anymore standing on left leg and putting on my right sock)

Easy fix there: don't wear socks.

Charlottesquare wrote: It also is when you cannot stand on one leg while putting on sock on the other (I can still stand on right leg and put on left sock but not so good anymore standing on left leg and putting on my right sock)

Well, yes, that's age. Wisdom, on the other hand, is when you realise that there's not really much need to perform the trick at all.

On the downside, sock-hopping carries the risk of overbalancing and putting your head through a window. (Especially if you haven't got your glasses on yet.) And then again, there's the fact that the bragging rights down the pub weren't that great anyway.

BJ

When your great grandaughter is watching a film where the ladies are wearing crinolenes and asks 'did you wear a dress like that when you went to dances Nana'?

R6

Charlottesquare wrote:Age is when you wake up, swivel round to sit on the side of the bed with your feet on the floor and then wait 30 seconds before standing up.

It's the initial standing up bit that I'm finding challenging...

Charlottesquare wrote:It also is when you cannot stand on one leg while putting on sock on the other (I can still stand on right leg and put on left sock but not so good anymore standing on left leg and putting on my right sock)

I am still tying to convince myself this is but a passing phase.

Charlottesquare wrote:Age is when you wake up, swivel round to sit on the side of the bed with your feet on the floor and then wait 30 seconds before standing up.

And then, as described by the wonderful Billy Connolly, you grunt when you stand up. Or sit down. Or bend down to pick up something from floor.

-- grunter kiloran

kiloran wrote:

Charlottesquare wrote:Age is when you wake up, swivel round to sit on the side of the bed with your feet on the floor and then wait 30 seconds before standing up.

And then, as described by the wonderful Billy Connolly, you grunt when you stand up. Or sit down. Or bend down to pick up something from floor.

-- grunter kiloran

Whereas wisdom (at any age, though more important as you grow, um, wiser) is where you minimise incidences of bending down. Use feet for low-lying tasks, and if you do bend down, be sure to do *all* tasks at once while you're down there.

Leothebear wrote:When doctors look like school kids....

I went into school and asked one of the kids to point out the teacher, "I am the teacher" she replied.

I thought it was when coppers looked like kids woz when it started.

When you get up or down and let out a loud one. Obvious it's you and can't make an excuse apart from a curry joke. Most embarrassing. Not so much if it's a quiet one, as imaginary clouds of the stuff formulate somewhere, and it's[*] positively lethal. but you simply wish the person who is gagging to bits a pleasant day and move abruptly leaving them thinking they just stumbled on a sewer pit.

Also so much easier to have a hot bath these days and have some good scissors to cut those ripper like toenails off that are harder than cement, so a good soaking is invaluable. Trouble is, stomach so huge can hardly get there without ripping one's stomach muscles and then after some contortion you manage to get the right angle, scream in agony, as you have forgotten that you can't see, and cut half your foot off, which results in you banging your head at the end of the bath and knocking yourself out.

You are old when you do not find any of this stuff funny any more.

Dod

Charlottesquare wrote:Age is when you wake up, swivel round to sit on the side of the bed with your feet on the floor and then wait 30 seconds before standing up.

It also is when you cannot stand on one leg while putting on sock on the other (I can still stand on right leg and put on left sock but not so good anymore standing on left leg and putting on my right sock)

I have got to the stage of putting my socks on sitting down. The left comes on fine, but the right sock is a problem. I have also started wearing braces to avoid the concertina effect when wearing a belt at the bottom of the legs. This all started when putting on underpants. Stood on left leg to put right leg in, then stood on the right when my right knee gave way.

Probably not too bad when you consider the knees are 90 years old.

Incidentally pop music effectively stopped in the 1960s, when guitars and groups came in. There has been the occasional jewel, but nothing to match Jo Stafford. Oh for the days of "Vocal Refrain".

TJH

nimnarb wrote:When you get up or down and let out a loud one. Obvious it's you and can't make an excuse apart from a curry joke. Most embarrassing. Not so much if it's a quiet one, as imaginary clouds of the stuff formulate somewhere, and it's[*] positively lethal. but you simply wish the person who is gagging to bits a pleasant day and move abruptly leaving them thinking they just stumbled on a sewer pit.

Also so much easier to have a hot bath these days and have some good scissors to cut those ripper like toenails off that are harder than cement, so a good soaking is invaluable. Trouble is, stomach so huge can hardly get there without ripping one's stomach muscles and then after some contortion you manage to get the right angle, scream in agony, as you have forgotten that you can't see, and cut half your foot off, which results in you banging your head at the end of the bath and knocking yourself out.

Can sort this if you have a shower over your bath- when you start a very long shower in it put in plug, as you shower your feet soak, at end of shower get out and use edge of bath to raise foot and cut your toenails.