Ice skating competition

[laladonny]

It is the Olympic men's figure skating. Out comes the Russian competitor. He skates around to some classical music in a slightly dull costume, performs some excellent leaps but without any great artistic feel for the music.

The Judges' scores read: Britain 5.8, Russia 5.9, United States 5.5, Ireland 6.0.

Next comes the Italian competitor in a sparkling costume, skating to some Italian music. He gets the crowd clapping, but is not technically as good as the Russian. He slightly misses landing a triple Salchow and loses the center during a spin. But, artistically, it is a more satisfying performance.

The Judges' scores read: Britain 5.8, Russia 5.5, United States 5.9, Ireland 6.0.

Finally out comes the U.S. entry wearing a tatty old jacket, with his skates tied over his boots. He reaches the ice, trips straight away and bangs his nose which starts bleeding. He tries to get up, staggers a few paces then slips again. He spends his entire 'routine' getting up then falling over again. Finally he crawls off the ice a tattered and bleeding mess.

The Judges' scores read: Britain 0.0, Russia 0.0, United States 6.0, Ireland 0.0.

The other 3 judges turn to the U.S. judge and demand in unison, "How the hell can you give that mess 6.0?!"

To which the U.S. judge replies "You've gotta remember, it's really slippery out there."

[bungeejumper]

A dual-citizenship issue, I imagine, but how did the Italian manage to be scoring the points for the Irish team?

BJ

[csearle]

A dual-citizenship issue, I imagine, but how did the Italian manage to be scoring the points for the Irish team?

I'm thinking maybe a mafia-IRA conspiricy here, maybe? C.