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Theft

Laughter is the best medicine, find and post jokes. nothing too saucy please, Dad jokes, Current news jokes..
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Sutch
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Theft

#278744

Postby Sutch » January 20th, 2020, 1:19 pm

To the person who stole my spectacles - look out, I will find you; I have contacts

stewamax
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Re: Theft

#278764

Postby stewamax » January 20th, 2020, 3:39 pm

Yours or Len's?

Watis
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Re: Theft

#278766

Postby Watis » January 20th, 2020, 3:43 pm

Could these jokes get any cornea?

stewamax
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Re: Theft

#278799

Postby stewamax » January 20th, 2020, 5:44 pm

I was wrong: there not Len's, they are Iris's

Itsallaguess
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Re: Theft

#278815

Postby Itsallaguess » January 20th, 2020, 7:45 pm

The other day I told a girl - "You look great without glasses.."

She said - "But I don't wear glasses..."

"No", I said, "But I do....."

Cheers!

Itsallaguess

csearle
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Re: Theft

#279040

Postby csearle » January 21st, 2020, 8:15 pm

Itsallaguess wrote:The other day I told a girl - "You look great without glasses.."

She said - "But I don't wear glasses..."

"No", I said, "But I do....."

Cheers!
Amazing that you are able to tell he tale.

stewamax
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Re: Theft

#279045

Postby stewamax » January 21st, 2020, 8:30 pm

So it was A&E, then a visit to Specsavers to replace the mangled pair then?

UncleEbenezer
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Re: Theft

#279076

Postby UncleEbenezer » January 22nd, 2020, 12:22 am

"And a very nice girl you will find her
She may very well pass for forty-three
In the dusk, with a light behind her"


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