Donate to Remove ads

Got a credit card? use our Credit Card & Finance Calculators

Thanks to Rhyd6,eyeball08,Wondergirly,bofh,johnstevens77, for Donating to support the site

Theft

Laughter is the best medicine, find and post jokes. nothing too saucy please, Dad jokes, Current news jokes..
Forum rules
Material posted here that is disparaging towards any group on the basis of race, faith, nationality, gender, disability or sexual orientation will be deleted and any poster of such material risks suspension.
Sutch
2 Lemon pips
Posts: 161
Joined: November 4th, 2016, 7:20 pm
Has thanked: 34 times
Been thanked: 113 times

Theft

#278744

Postby Sutch » January 20th, 2020, 1:19 pm

To the person who stole my spectacles - look out, I will find you; I have contacts

stewamax
Lemon Quarter
Posts: 2460
Joined: November 7th, 2016, 2:40 pm
Has thanked: 84 times
Been thanked: 805 times

Re: Theft

#278764

Postby stewamax » January 20th, 2020, 3:39 pm

Yours or Len's?

Watis
Lemon Quarter
Posts: 1421
Joined: November 5th, 2016, 10:53 am
Has thanked: 355 times
Been thanked: 497 times

Re: Theft

#278766

Postby Watis » January 20th, 2020, 3:43 pm

Could these jokes get any cornea?

stewamax
Lemon Quarter
Posts: 2460
Joined: November 7th, 2016, 2:40 pm
Has thanked: 84 times
Been thanked: 805 times

Re: Theft

#278799

Postby stewamax » January 20th, 2020, 5:44 pm

I was wrong: there not Len's, they are Iris's

Itsallaguess
Lemon Half
Posts: 9129
Joined: November 4th, 2016, 1:16 pm
Has thanked: 4140 times
Been thanked: 10032 times

Re: Theft

#278815

Postby Itsallaguess » January 20th, 2020, 7:45 pm

The other day I told a girl - "You look great without glasses.."

She said - "But I don't wear glasses..."

"No", I said, "But I do....."

Cheers!

Itsallaguess

csearle
Lemon Quarter
Posts: 4834
Joined: November 4th, 2016, 2:24 pm
Has thanked: 4859 times
Been thanked: 2121 times

Re: Theft

#279040

Postby csearle » January 21st, 2020, 8:15 pm

Itsallaguess wrote:The other day I told a girl - "You look great without glasses.."

She said - "But I don't wear glasses..."

"No", I said, "But I do....."

Cheers!
Amazing that you are able to tell he tale.

stewamax
Lemon Quarter
Posts: 2460
Joined: November 7th, 2016, 2:40 pm
Has thanked: 84 times
Been thanked: 805 times

Re: Theft

#279045

Postby stewamax » January 21st, 2020, 8:30 pm

So it was A&E, then a visit to Specsavers to replace the mangled pair then?

UncleEbenezer
The full Lemon
Posts: 10813
Joined: November 4th, 2016, 8:17 pm
Has thanked: 1471 times
Been thanked: 3005 times

Re: Theft

#279076

Postby UncleEbenezer » January 22nd, 2020, 12:22 am

"And a very nice girl you will find her
She may very well pass for forty-three
In the dusk, with a light behind her"


Return to “Laughing Lemons”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 15 guests