Quickies

[laladonny]

I have an answering machine in my car. It says "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out."

I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn't have to go so fast.

I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world. Perhaps you've seen it.

I saw a chicken crossing the road. I asked it why. It told me it was none of my business.

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.

I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 55 miles per hour?'. So I said, 'oh, that's OK, I'm not going that far.'

I made wine out of raisins so I wouldn't have to wait for it to age.