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Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

Laughter is the best medicine, find and post jokes. nothing too saucy please, Dad jokes, Current news jokes..
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mannannan
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Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#616919

Postby mannannan » September 25th, 2023, 4:18 am

(You know the hymn tune ....)


We spray the fields and scatter
The poison on the ground
So that no wicked wild flowers
Upon our farm be found.
We like whatever helps us
To line our purse with pence;
The twenty-four-hour broiler-house
And neat electric fence.


All concrete sheds around us
And Jaguars in the yard,
The telly lounge and deep-freeze
Are ours from working hard.


We fire the fields for harvest,
The hedges swell the flame,
The oak trees and the cottages
From which our fathers came.
We give no compensation,
The earth is ours today,
And if we lose on arable,
The bungalows will pay.


All concrete sheds around us
And Jaguars in the yard
The telly lounge and deep freeze
Are ours from working hard.

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#616975

Postby stewamax » September 25th, 2023, 9:55 am

Betjeman loved the associated tune (‘Aurelia’ by Samuel Wesley) and also used it for another and better-known parody "The Church's Restoration"

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#616998

Postby stevensfo » September 25th, 2023, 12:12 pm

Off at a slight tangent, but when I was little, we sang that hymn a lot at school.

I learned to read at a very young age and read a lot of comics.

I was too young to realise that the 2nd line was a continuation but I knew, from comics, that 'scatter' meant 'run away'.

So for many years I had this silly image of people ploughing the fields and then running away. Probably with an irate farmer chasing them. :D


Steve

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#617011

Postby Watis » September 25th, 2023, 12:56 pm

I had a similar problem with Psalm 23:

"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want."

So I spent most of my schooldays thinking that I do not want the Lord, as the alternative meaning of 'want' was lost on me. The modifying effect of the semicolon was similarly overlooked.

Watis

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#617175

Postby bungeejumper » September 26th, 2023, 11:28 am

Which reminds me, for no particular reason, of Betjeman's ode to a strappingly-attractive farm girl called Pearl. (Yes, he was mostly straight, despite appearances.) Half doggerel, half sepia-tinted retro. One of the better tracks on my ancient vinyl copy of Betjeman's Banana Blush. (Recommended.)

https://genius.com/Sir-john-betjeman-ag ... ess-lyrics

BJ

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#617601

Postby SteelCamel » September 28th, 2023, 8:45 am

Watis wrote:I had a similar problem with Psalm 23:

"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want."

So I spent most of my schooldays thinking that I do not want the Lord, as the alternative meaning of 'want' was lost on me. The modifying effect of the semicolon was similarly overlooked.

Watis


"Want" has shifted in meaning from roughly "lack" to "desire". Which does make interpreting older texts confusing. As in this example (riddles may be a little off-topic, but there's a joke of sorts in there):

The poor have it
The rich want it
It is greater than God
It is more evil than the Devil
If you eat it, you will die
What is it?

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#617708

Postby WickedLester » September 28th, 2023, 5:11 pm

Is it Time?

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#617714

Postby kempiejon » September 28th, 2023, 5:37 pm

WickedLester wrote:Is it Time?

Don't think so.
What is greater than God?

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#617719

Postby WickedLester » September 28th, 2023, 6:15 pm

Nothing then?

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#617726

Postby Urbandreamer » September 28th, 2023, 7:10 pm

WickedLester wrote:Nothing then?


You know that I read your post to imply that there was no answer, then spent ages to come up with the same answer!
:o

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#618212

Postby SteelCamel » October 1st, 2023, 7:18 pm

Yes, that's the correct answer. The poor have nothing, the rich want (lack) nothing. Nothing is greater than God, and nothing is more evil than the Devil. If you eat nothing, you will die.

"Time" was the unintentional correct answer Bilbo Baggins gave to one of the riddles in The Hobbit, which uses a similar idea:

This thing all things devours;
Birds, beasts, trees, flowers;
Gnaws iron, bites steel;
Grinds hard stones to meal;
Slays king, ruins town,
And beats mountain down.

But this is the wrong board for riddles, so I really should add a joke.


What do liars do after they die?



Lie still.

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Re: Modern Farming by John Betjeman (decades ago)

#618426

Postby brightncheerful » October 2nd, 2023, 6:13 pm

Until 'autumn' took over, the season between August and November was called 'harvest'.

---

When i was young there was a dance studio in the town where i lived, called Les Wildes.

For years I thought 'Les' was French (plural) for The
Until I realised it was the short form of Leslie.

[which looking it up just now "Origin:Scottish. Meaning:holly garden. Leslie is a gender-neutral name of Scottish origin that can help baby connect with their roots. It translates to “holly garden,” an evergreen plant with bright red berries that grows all over Scotland and beyond."]


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