Sunnypad wrote:
She expects me to do everything and got cross about paying for carers because "they don't do any more than what you do".
Sunnypad wrote:
In real life, all I hear is "you have to do what's best for your mother"
Taking the above two separate quotes in aggregate Sunnypad, it seems to me that the key element missing here is someone else, other than you, urgently talking to your Mum about perhaps 'doing what's best for Sunnypad', because from the above there seems to be very little of that consideration on her part, which seems to be having a terrible long term effect on your health and well-being.
Is there anyone close to your mother who could try and persuade her to pay for some level of alternative care, with a view to 'doing what's best for Sunnypad', which ultimately will also help to deliver the best long-term care for your mother as well....?
If there isn't then is that particular engagement with your Mum something you could perhaps talk to Social Services about, so they could perhaps talk to her about why it's so vitally important for the both of you that the current situation needs to change?
A part-time Sunnypad must be a much more beneficial prospect than a completely-broken Sunnypad, and that desperate fact needs conveying to your Mum with some urgency from someone who she will listen to.
All the best.
Itsallaguess