The Way to a Girl's Heart

[WickedLester]

Why is it if you buy a bird perfume she decides you must think she's perfect?

[bungeejumper]

It's more romantic than Jeyes' fluid, I suppose?

BJ

[Mike4]

Why is it if you buy a bird perfume she decides you must think she's perfect?

I used to have a parrot but I never bought him perfume.

[WickedLester]

Why is it if you buy a bird perfume she decides you must think she's perfect?

I used to have a parrot but I never bought him perfume.

I bet he wouldn't stop rabbiting about it.

[jfgw]

Why is it if you buy a bird perfume she decides you must think she's perfect?

What part of Southend are you from?

Julian F. G. W.

[WickedLester]

Why is it if you buy a bird perfume she decides you must think she's perfect?

What part of Southend are you from?

Julian F. G. W.

Westcliff.

[UncleEbenezer]

To buy a girl perfume surely signals you think she smells worse than the perfume.

That's harsh, even if she's utterly incontinent. Unless she's a smoker.

[Lootman]

To buy a girl perfume surely signals you think she smells worse than the perfume.

That's harsh, even if she's utterly incontinent. Unless she's a smoker.

But isn't smell an intensely personal and subjective thing?

An aromatic mix of stale beer, cheap perfume and desperation can be intoxicating.

[UncleEbenezer]

An aromatic mix of stale beer, cheap perfume and desperation can be intoxicating.

Is that what makes you incontinent?

[stewamax]

But isn't smell an intensely personal and subjective thing? An aromatic mix of stale beer, cheap perfume and desperation can be intoxicating.

Here in Rutland we rely on wafts of horse-poo and dung-spreading.
But we are rightly suspicious of anything emanating from further south than the River Welland, so the typical 'Sarfend' breath and armpit reek is a satanic abomination.
But I guess if you are desparate ...

[WickedLester]

But isn't smell an intensely personal and subjective thing? An aromatic mix of stale beer, cheap perfume and desperation can be intoxicating.

Here in Rutland we rely on wafts of horse-poo and dung-spreading.
But we are rightly suspicious of anything emanating from further south than the River Welland, so the typical 'Sarfend' breath and armpit reek is a satanic abomination.
But I guess if you are desparate ...

Sounds good to me, but who's turn is it to be daddy?

[monabri]

No wonder we Northerners prefer our pigeons and ferrets.

[kempiejon]

I thought it was crack the chest and spread the ribs?

[servodude]

I thought it was crack the chest and spread the ribs?

You old romantic!

[stewamax]

I thought it was crack the chest and spread the ribs?

An novel idea for a Valentine card perhaps? Except that you might get a crack on the head in loving appreciation.